How it feels to be stuck
Trapped. Boxed in. Ruled over. A slave. A servant.
Like you are on a never ending treadmill of doom.
As if you are being dragged from week to week with only a glimmer of joy from the off weekend and that glorious two-week holiday to look forward to.
The feeling of Sunday night when you want to hit the pause button.
And the absolute joy of signing off on a Friday night.
This may sound like being stuck is a day job issue. It can be a weekly routine as a stay at home Mum or Dad. It can be so many things.
The important part is to acknowledge the feeling and want to change it.
The illusion of no control
In this situation, it can feel like you have no control. Like everyone and everything else around you is demanding your time, attention and energy. As is every waking moment is devoted to other people’s priorities and there is never time for you, let alone time for you to work on you.
This is what gives rise to that feeling of being stuck. It is what drives the wanting to take control and become unstuck.
But this lack of control is an illusion.
You have made choices that have put you in this situation and you can own decisions to change it.
However you landed here, there is a way to change it. There is a road to a calmer more happy place and it starts with the smaller things……
5 steps to taking control
1. Focus on the small things
Start by looking at a very small element of your day / week that is the most frustrating. A small but annoying part. And consider how that could be different. Is there someone else who is managing that part well that you can emulate? Or a way of delegating the task? Consider why it needs to be done in the first place and see if you can mitigate it completely.
2. Build in small changes
When you have made a small change, build in something that is for you. If you have managed to build in a 30 minute slot, plan in something immediately that ‘recovers’ that slot for you. You could go for a walk, read, listen to a podcast, watch something, learn something. Make it for you and your benefit. Like the reward for making the space.
3. Test different approaches
Some tasks can be eliminated, others mitigated or made more efficient. And where it needs the support of others, share with them what you are trying to do and why. Once one element of the day / week has been addressed, you will build up a process to be confident to take on more. Always consider that there is room for improvement. Could you help yourself as if you are helping someone else?
4. Cement the preferred behaviours
When that particular element has been controlled, look for the next part that feels like it needs the same process applied. Release more of your day / week to become unstuck and build confidence that you can do this in more areas of your life. Sharing the journey and helping others to do the same can build energy behind the changes, particularly if the reward you want for one of the improvements is something the whole group / team / family can enjoy. Creating a passion for taking control becomes infectious.
5. Remain focused, eyes down, working on YOU
There is a saying that a company without problems, has problems. As if they are oblivious to the issues so everything carried on as normal. And if we liken that to us as individuals, it can be very much the same. Those that are like a company without problems will say they are fine when asked ‘are you ok?’ and not elaborate. Those who know there is room for improvement will say something along the lines of ‘I’m fine, on the whole’ or ‘Well, I am ok (ish)’ and then feel they should justify the comment and open up.
So start to take control and become unstuck. Know where and how to do it. Free yourself.
An example of how I became unstuck
As with most people, I can get stuck too. I recall when I was studying at University and my final year project was looming. I had really no clue on where I should focus. It had to be a project that would benefit the organisation worked for (who were paying the bill of the degree!).
The title of the project was to be ‘Managing knowledge in a Global Engineering Business’. Which opened up many avenues that the content could go. Some were way more technical or different to my background / current work that it would have been a very time consuming task.
So I sat with my then boss, my mentor. We worked on the topic and how my day job (business improvement, processes and tools) could support the topic and I found a way to use my six sigma training to improve data quality in a system – thus supporting the business to have a more reliable data set with which to report.
Not only as this a win for getting my project done, but it was recognised as one of the first known instances of using six sigma to fix a knowledge management issue.
Sitting back and looking at the problem from a different angle, with less stress and someone I trusted, helped me to take control and become unstuck.
The 6 Stage Program
On the basis of taking control and becoming unstuck, I have developed a 6-stage programme to navigate this form of taking control for yourself. I wrote it after I had been through a job change that I needed to orchestrate for myself. And in fact, I am applying all the same steps again as I go through this another time.
The programme takes you through stages of knowing yourself, assessing your ‘current state’, looking towards a ‘future state’ and then assessing the steps and plan to bridge the gap.
By knowing yourself, and building the confidence to reach out to those who can help influence your life, leaving no possibility ignored, no stone unturned and nothing to chance. YOU are working on yourself. On ‘Project You’. You are showing the universe what you want and you are not leaving it to chance that it will be delivered. So you can see the connection with taking control, becoming unstuck and how this is deeply woven into the fabric of the programme.
The beauty of this programme is that anyone can use it to guide them to be happier in life!
Fast Track to The Solution
So if you are also feeling boxed in, stuck and not in control, I feel your pain. Click the link ‘here‘ and save yourself the hassle I had of navigating a path out of this. Allow me to help fast-track you to this positive, confident and happy place I now find myself in. I want to help you improve your feeling of being in control and unstuck.
Let’s get you started on the 6 steps to success!